326

Re: Your jokes

You know me - footy jokes and hope I'm not repeating myself...

There was a bunch of flies kicking a ball about on a plate.
One player turned to another and said: "you'd better pick up your game Jamie, we're playing in the cup tomorrow"

Re: Your jokes

Sandy wrote:

You know me - footy jokes and hope I'm not repeating myself...

There was a bunch of flies kicking a ball about on a plate.
One player turned to another and said: "you'd better pick up your game Jamie, we're playing in the cup tomorrow"

https://www.millan.net/minimations/smileys/groooansmileyf.gif

"I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
Death thought about it.
"Cats," he said eventually. "Cats are nice."
Terry Pratchett, Sourcery

328 (edited by GB 2024-10-24 07:11:46)

Re: Your jokes

Folk song.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0Kzje9nF4A

Another (earlier) version.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFUj6LH4FSI

Credendi non mutant facta

Re: Your jokes

Thanks, Geoff. I wasn’t aware of the existence of a sung version of The Bricklayer’s Lament.

“Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. The only moment there ever is.”
― Eckhart Tolle

Re: Your jokes

https://i.postimg.cc/4HvNfYG1/IMG-5620.jpg

“Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. The only moment there ever is.”
― Eckhart Tolle

Re: Your jokes

It’s easy to be wise after the event, or so they tell me!

It’s easy to be wise after the wrong choice of pasta, orzo they tell me!

“Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. The only moment there ever is.”
― Eckhart Tolle

Re: Your jokes

Alfred wrote:

It’s easy to be wise after the event, or so they tell me!

It’s easy to be wise after the wrong choice of pasta, orzo they tell me!

It’s easy tube wise after the wrong choice of penne or rigatoni, or so they tell me!

“Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. The only moment there ever is.”
― Eckhart Tolle

Re: Your jokes

Alfred wrote:
Alfred wrote:

It’s easy to be wise after the event, or so they tell me!

It’s easy to be wise after the wrong choice of pasta, orzo they tell me!

It’s easy tube wise after the wrong choice of penne or rigatoni, or so they tell me!

It’s easy tutu be wise after the wrong choice of ballet dress, or so they tell me!

“Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. The only moment there ever is.”
― Eckhart Tolle

Re: Your jokes

I’m not sure that this really belongs in ‘Your jokes’…

https://i.postimg.cc/gXfC7875/IMG-6825.jpg

“Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. The only moment there ever is.”
― Eckhart Tolle

335

Re: Your jokes

I’m not sure that this really belongs in ‘Your jokes’…

30 years ago? That was in the last century...  18 something? I still think of the 1990s as just yesterday!

Credendi non mutant facta

336

Re: Your jokes

I wasn't expecting this reply.

https://i.postimg.cc/8JxtRyjb/cadbury.jpg

Somewhere over the rainbow, weigh a pie ...

Re: Your jokes

https://i.postimg.cc/3dzZZvDQ/IMG-3252.jpg

“Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. The only moment there ever is.”
― Eckhart Tolle

338

Re: Your jokes

https://i.postimg.cc/BPtXYQZy/21-Today-Robbo-RED-CARD-01.jpg

Re: Your jokes

An old joke in its period setting.

A man goes into a greengrocer's shop and asks how much is a bag of tomatoes.

The greengocer says that a bag of tomatoes is half a crown.

The man says that at the greengrocer's up the road a bag of tomatoes is two shillings, but they haven't got any at the moment.

"Ah," replies the greengrocer, "when we haven't got any, ours are one and six."

Re: Your jokes

William wrote:

An old joke in its period setting.

A man goes into a greengrocer's shop and asks how much is a bag of tomatoes.

The greengocer says that a bag of tomatoes is half a crown.

The man says that at the greengrocer's up the road a bag of tomatoes is two shillings, but they haven't got any at the moment.

"Ah," replies the greengrocer, "when we haven't got any, ours are one and six."

Very good, William!

For those who are unfamiliar with pre-decimal British currency, there were twenty shillings to a pound and twelve pence to a shilling. A crown was five shillings, so half a crown was two shillings and sixpence (usually abbreviated as “two and six”); “one and six” was one shilling less than that.

“Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. The only moment there ever is.”
― Eckhart Tolle

341

Re: Your jokes

A crown was five shillings

Yes, but there was no crown coin in normal circulation, so a sum of 5 shillings was generally referred to as that, or as "two half crowns", not "one crown". Also two shillings was one florin, and often  referred to as that. Prior to coins bearing the head of George VI, the two shilling value coin was marked "One Florin". It was also not uncommon for the sum of "one and six" to be referred to as "eighteen pence".

Crown coins were legal tender, but they were only issued to commemorate special events so were not in general circulation. Probably the most familiar one is the Churchill Crown, which is the only British coin ever to bear the head of anyone other than the reigning monarch.

To elucidate, or perhaps confuse, further, one shilling became five (new) pence.

Credendi non mutant facta

Re: Your jokes

GB wrote:

Crown coins were legal tender, but they were only issued to commemorate special events so were not in general circulation. Probably the most familiar one is the Churchill Crown, which is the only British coin ever to bear the head of anyone other than the reigning monarch.

I believe the Royal Mint still issues commemorative crown coins. I have a feeling that the last occasion wasn’t terribly long ago.

“Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. The only moment there ever is.”
― Eckhart Tolle

Re: Your jokes

Alfred wrote:

I believe the Royal Mint still issues commemorative crown coins. I have a feeling that the last occasion wasn’t terribly long ago.

https://www.royalmint.com/shop/denominations/crown

“Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. The only moment there ever is.”
― Eckhart Tolle

344

Re: Your jokes

Half crowns were also known as half a dollar. As kids we sometimes used that phrase, which probably stems from when £1 was worth $4

Somewhere over the rainbow, weigh a pie ...

Re: Your jokes

GB wrote:

A crown was five shillings

Yes, but there was no crown coin in normal circulation, so a sum of 5 shillings was generally referred to as that, or as "two half crowns", not "one crown".

Or as "five bob".

Re: Your jokes

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Florin_(British_coin)

Re: Your jokes

https://i.postimg.cc/dL8WWCyw/IMG-4560.jpg

“Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. The only moment there ever is.”
― Eckhart Tolle

348 (edited by William 2025-06-29 22:28:33)

Re: Your jokes

While looking for the 22! strawberries humour for the following post in another thread,

https://punster.me/serif/viewtopic.php?pid=7324#p7324

I noticed the following post

https://punster.me/serif/viewtopic.php?pid=1155#p1155

I like the supporting art,

he carrying a bottle,

she having a shoulder bag,

the streetlight

the shrubbery in the background and the shading on it

the plant below the window

the brickwork of the house

the various direcions of the shading lines on the car

no letterbox, is that the back door?

and no keyhole on the door

and what they are walking on is not shown as a straight line

349 (edited by William 2025-07-09 01:07:57)

Re: Your jokes

I have just been doing a lesson in the Duolingo Welsh course and the following sentence came up.

Noswaith dda, Draig, ble mae'r pannas?

I thought that that was funny.

Very funny actually.

I wonder what picture Copilot will produce.

Re: Your jokes

https://i.postimg.cc/nX5Zysq3/BCO-4ac05a43-e9a8-4f6c-a086-b460e486a882.png

Noswaith dda, Draig, ble mae'r pannas?