Re: Your jokes

William wrote:

a score of 22!

Should that be read as “a score of 22 [remarkably]” or “a score of 1124000727777607680000“?

“Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. The only moment there ever is.”
― Eckhart Tolle

Re: Your jokes

It was running humour from the posts about the label on the jar of jam.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8CFs-CDtPAA

378 (edited by William 2025-07-15 12:42:22)

Re: Your jokes

I wrote this fifty word science fiction story over five years ago. Not a joke as such, more a story with a humorous implication.


https://i.postimg.cc/8FPqMdjQ/holiday.png

Re: Your jokes

https://i.postimg.cc/G4VHvBTs/IMG-1754.jpg

"I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
Death thought about it.
"Cats," he said eventually. "Cats are nice."
Terry Pratchett, Sourcery

Re: Your jokes

KarenPL wrote:

https://i.postimg.cc/G4VHvBTs/IMG-1754.jpg

An unrelentingly English English joke, that one! It doesn’t work with the rhotic accents that are commonly found in my neck of the woods.

“Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. The only moment there ever is.”
― Eckhart Tolle

Re: Your jokes

Alfred wrote:
KarenPL wrote:

https://i.postimg.cc/G4VHvBTs/IMG-1754.jpg

An unrelentingly English English joke, that one! It doesn’t work with the rhotic accents that are commonly found in my neck of the woods.

In your neck of the woods does khaki rhyme with tacky?

Re: Your jokes

https://wordhistories.net/2021/04/05/neck-of-woods/

Re: Your jokes

William wrote:
Alfred wrote:

An unrelentingly English English joke, that one! It doesn’t work with the rhotic accents that are commonly found in my neck of the woods.

In your neck of the woods does khaki rhyme with tacky?

No, I don’t think the vowel sound is the same in those two words. However, the point is that the joke depends on the ‘intrusive r’ that typically occurs in English as spoken south of the border but not in English as spoken in Central Scotland: there’s generally a distinction here between ‘kah-kee’ and ‘kar-kee’.

“Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. The only moment there ever is.”
― Eckhart Tolle

Re: Your jokes

William wrote:
Alfred wrote:
KarenPL wrote:

https://i.postimg.cc/G4VHvBTs/IMG-1754.jpg

An unrelentingly English English joke, that one! It doesn’t work with the rhotic accents that are commonly found in my neck of the woods.

In your neck of the woods does khaki rhyme with tacky?

Nope, here in the Midlands, it sounds like car key, hence why I found the above an amusing play on words. My cousin, ex-Parachute Regiment, so very familiar with the term https://punster.me/images/wink.gif, from the Yorkshire/County Durham border, says it the same way.

The Cambridge Dictionary gives an audio of how it is pronounced in English and American. The American version sounds closer to tacky, but I'm a Brit, not a Yank. https://punster.me/images/tongue.gif

https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictio … lish/khaki

"I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
Death thought about it.
"Cats," he said eventually. "Cats are nice."
Terry Pratchett, Sourcery

Re: Your jokes

KarenPL wrote:

The Cambridge Dictionary gives an audio of how it is pronounced in English and American. The American version sounds closer to tacky, but I'm a Brit, not a Yank. https://punster.me/images/tongue.gif

https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictio … lish/khaki

I see that there are two US pronouns shown in IPA on that page, but (presumably because one is the same as the UK version) they only include an audio sample for the one that differs.

UK  /ˈkɑː.ki/ US  /ˈkæ.ki/ /ˈkɑː.ki/

So the UK pronunciation uses /ɑː/ (a long /ɑ/) whereas the typical US pronunciation uses /æ/, which I understand to be articulated further forward.

“Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. The only moment there ever is.”
― Eckhart Tolle

Re: Your jokes

I remember a movie where a woman driver in khaki army uniform in World Warv 2 showed her finger nails with nail polish on them and said "khaki" in a way that rhymed with "tacky". Had she been told off for previously having red nail polish?

https://www.etymonline.com/word/khaki

khaki(n.)
"dust-colored cloth," 1857, from Urdu khaki, literally "dusty," from khak "dust," a word from Persian. Used principally at first for uniforms of British cavalry in India, introduced in the Guide Corps, 1846; widely adopted for camouflage purposes in the Boer Wars (1899-1902). It once had overtones of militarism. As an adjective from 1863. Related: Khakis.

387 (edited by KarenPL 2025-07-26 21:00:32)

Re: Your jokes

https://www.millan.net/minimations/smileys/groooansmileyf.gif

https://i.postimg.cc/06YmPK7B/IMG-1755.jpg

"I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
Death thought about it.
"Cats," he said eventually. "Cats are nice."
Terry Pratchett, Sourcery

Re: Your jokes

KarenPL wrote:

https://www.millan.net/minimations/smileys/groooansmileyf.gif

https://i.postimg.cc/06YmPK7B/IMG-1755.jpg

I’m reminded of a cousin’s visit to Scotland more than a half a century ago. He and a friend were in the US Navy, and they wanted to visit the US naval base here, but when he asked one of the locals “Where do we catch the Dunoon ferry?” the answer (accompanied by an outstretched arm with a pointing finger) was something like “Oh, you just missed her! She flew over that way.”

“Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. The only moment there ever is.”
― Eckhart Tolle

Re: Your jokes

KarenPL wrote:

https://www.millan.net/minimations/smileys/groooansmileyf.gif

https://i.postimg.cc/06YmPK7B/IMG-1755.jpg

Is the ferry molar powered?

Re: Your jokes

William wrote:
KarenPL wrote:

https://www.millan.net/minimations/smileys/groooansmileyf.gif

https://i.postimg.cc/06YmPK7B/IMG-1755.jpg

Is the ferry molar powered?

LOL. You’re really getting your teeth into this, aren’t you!

“Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. The only moment there ever is.”
― Eckhart Tolle

Re: Your jokes

Alfred wrote:
William wrote:
KarenPL wrote:

https://www.millan.net/minimations/smileys/groooansmileyf.gif

https://i.postimg.cc/06YmPK7B/IMG-1755.jpg

Is the ferry molar powered?

LOL. You’re really getting your teeth into this, aren’t you!

I suppose it would be pertinent to ask whether the ferry always follows the same ‘root’.

“Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. The only moment there ever is.”
― Eckhart Tolle

Re: Your jokes

Alfred wrote:
Alfred wrote:
William wrote:

Is the ferry molar powered?

LOL. You’re really getting your teeth into this, aren’t you!

I suppose it would be pertinent to ask whether the ferry always follows the same ‘root’.

German-speaking passengers might wonder whether they can book by Email.

“Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. The only moment there ever is.”
― Eckhart Tolle

Re: Your jokes

Found on the Punny Pete Facebook page. https://punster.me/images/laugh.gif


https://i.postimg.cc/QKcvqz86/469961712-9063014463719975-3240303666718342735-n.jpg

"I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
Death thought about it.
"Cats," he said eventually. "Cats are nice."
Terry Pratchett, Sourcery

Re: Your jokes

LOL, Karen. Good one!

“Welcome to the present moment. Here. Now. The only moment there ever is.”
― Eckhart Tolle

Re: Your jokes

Just spotted in a Facebook Group. https://punster.me/images/laugh.gif


https://i.postimg.cc/0696VJQ1/IMG-1756.jpg

"I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
Death thought about it.
"Cats," he said eventually. "Cats are nice."
Terry Pratchett, Sourcery

Re: Your jokes

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/giFTV37-X7o

Re: Your jokes

https://punster.me/images/laugh.gifhttps://punster.me/images/laugh.gifhttps://punster.me/images/laugh.gif


https://i.postimg.cc/HjkNQzW5/527448905-1188144576663749-6073911841972787608-n.jpg

"I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
Death thought about it.
"Cats," he said eventually. "Cats are nice."
Terry Pratchett, Sourcery

Re: Your jokes

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/fv6hUgffBuU

Re: Your jokes

https://punster.me/images/laugh.gifhttps://punster.me/images/laugh.gifhttps://punster.me/images/laugh.gif


https://i.postimg.cc/t79yxqRQ/235036169-4404982682856533-7035185190614216219-n.jpg

Punny Pete
>Scarlett Overkill<

"I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
Death thought about it.
"Cats," he said eventually. "Cats are nice."
Terry Pratchett, Sourcery

400

Re: Your jokes

A Tommy Cooper classic:

You look like a pepper pot.
Thank you, I'll take that as a condiment.

Somewhere over the rainbow, weigh a pie ...